Masai: The Nutella part 1

Ciò chì salverà a nostra lingua ? : u plurilinguisimu !

A dicenu tutti…

Once upon a time, many years ago, ghjeramu at the beginning of the iniziu of the mondu.  There was the chaos. Un burdellu scemu…. One day, God -God era u nome di scena di Dio,  mettimu, like the brothers Bernardini chì si facenu chjamà The Mouflons-,  one day dunque, God, had una idea fulminente.  God created the Nutella. And God sapia chì the Nutella was good, very good un sprupositu. And the tichjina of God was longa longa. He manged one million of vasetti di Nutella,  sfrutting the fact that God ùn hà una mamma chì li sdrilla adossu if you eat un pocu troppu.  And after this manghjata spaventosa, God invented the corsa scema at the water closet, and some altre Nutella's derivations, tali the red brisgioli, the pendicon’ panza, and cetera, and cetera (di Pigna) . After di which (dopudichè) he invented Adamò. But not the sixtees old singer, cuglioni chì stinzanu, you permitted mister, no no, Adamò è Eva.  And the Eden Ortu. Poi God disse à Adamò and Eva: "Now, you have all the Terrestre Paradise. Pudete fà tuttu tuttu  you have the permission to eat, to drink, to kiss, ballà scicca contr’à scicca; nothing travagliu, nothing affitti merdosi, cuntori Veolia, concors of impiegati municipali, coda at the post office, nothing AFPA, AGEFOS PME, COTOREP, CNPF, CFDT. Only a very oziosa life, gratting your palle: television, telenovele, football, ralenti actions of buts, the Just Price, Thalassa on friday , and cetera, and cetera (di Pigna). You have gratis restaurants, cinema, theaters, bagnarole di ramu, jet ski, air-conditioned, moquette, sulaghje, red tumette, tappetti oriental fiber tressed, bidet, omelette, frisbee.

There's just one thing, remember nadin’ omok, just una cosa , one fucking thing absolutely prohibited: tuccà The Alberu of Nutella.

The second puntata is to morrow…